Why Do I (Teenager) Feel So Lonely?

Want to talk about it?

Feel free to drop me an inbox if you want someone to talk to or if you just want to be listened. I am here to help :)


Why do we consider ourselves so alone?

Some teenagers feel alone and would like some company once in a while.

Most of them would not admit that fully (that they need help) but in the end, everyone does, whether its obvious or not, or whether we want it or not. Most of the time, we are certain of managing everything by ourselves, but in reality we can't. It is considered to be one of the most difficult phases of life. And it is just like that.

I find myself sitting alone in my room (even because I have no sisters or brothers) and just open up the internet and go on social network in the hope that someone does care about you. In the hope that other people appreciate you for who you are. Some of your friends do, and some of them fake it. How can you know?

I guess school makes it difficult at this point. For example, in my school, everyone is snobby and only cares about physical appearance. I am not like that. Many people change their attitude, their ways, their personality and themselves in order to be accepted by this little strange society.

Your parents won't "understand" your problems even if they say they do. What we do instead, we go on the internet, go on websites like "StumbleUpon", "Tumblr", "Twitter" and mostly on "Facebook" or "Skype", to find something: the passion that we lost, the happiness that we need.

Now I know that happiness cannot be found on the internet, but a little distraction is very useful at times. Especially if you feel like crying an you go on the internet and find people of your same age having the same issues and dealing with them like you do. Its nice to know that you are not the only one having that particular problem. You can see their point of views.

And like this you make friends. VIrtual friends that you wish were real and were right beside you. But they aren't. WHY???!! Why can't we have long term lasting friends... ? People talk behind our backs, especially the ones you thought were your friends.

I know this is kind of depressing but in a teenage world, most of it works like this. Time changes and people get meaner and meaner as we grow. They care about how thin your are and how popular you are... not how your personality is. WHAT A SAD WORLD.

People expect you to be who you're not.

Why do I always have to look good for other people.. and when I do for me, people blame me for that. They don't accept who you really are and there is this famous quote that states: "We don't let change happen, because when a thing is different, we change it back to normal".


They are the most unsatisfying feelings of all.

.You really trust someone and would be ready to do anything for them and they let you down the moment you need them. This happens to me all the time. I wonder why...I am such a good friend and let other people ruin my life so easily. What I do then, is have a friend less and continue with my life as usual... problematic as always... nothing much

Reasons why we feel alone

  • Family problems (most of the pain comes from here)
  • No real friends (just faces that pretend to be)
  • No acceptance in society (as a whole or even in smaller groups like schools... who you are may not be accepted from everyone.. and yet... we all have right... unfortunately not respected for some of us)
  • Not satisfied with your life
  • No-one understands you
  • Not accepted for your choices (music artists/genre, fashion style, personality, etc.)
  • Prejudices (some people find it fun to criticize you when they have no clue who you are, and as they do so, other people start to think negative things about you as well, and so rumors start.. and when they do... its difficult to stop them)
  • Being afraid to speak up (sharing of opinions becomes difficult, and you get trapped by your own self)

There are so many more reason... the list is just to long ...

Never give up believing

Related Quotes

"And be careful of what you do, 'cause the lie become the truth" Michael Jackson

"There's nothing wrong with you, there's a lot wrong with the world you live in" Chris Colfer

"Do not wish to be anything but what you are, and try to be that perfectly" St. Francis De Sales

"It is better to be hated for who you are, than to be love for something you are not" Andre Gide

"No-one can make you feel inferior without your consent" Eleanor Roosevelt

"If you care about what others think, then you will be forever their slave"

"Don't ever let somebody tell you, you can't do something" Will Smith

"Life is not about people who act true to your face. It's about people who remain true behind your back"

"Learn to appreciate what you have, before time makes you appreciate what you had"

Remember this always

Comments 99 comments

crackers10 profile image

crackers10 5 years ago from DreamWorld

Oh yea,I remember those feelings. I'm 23 so it wasn't too awful long ago. I remember wishing I could fit in,but not really wanting to because the cool kids were morons. They were selfish,superficial,mean,and dumb. But we wanted to be like them anyway. And why? Because it meant we wouldn't sit alone at lunch,it meant having people to talk to. I was the kid that wanted to fit in,wanted everyone to like them but refused to hide myself to do it. As a result everyone thought I was weird and didn't really like me. But you know what? The qualities that made those kids turn up their noses are the same qualities that people love in me now as an adult. I know that this is a typical adult thing to say and I really loathe saying it but...that lonely? It'll pass. Being a teenager is such a brief time period. It's hard to ignore the violent emotions and it's so easy to believe that they are the only things in the world. But they aren't. There's life passed being a teenager. And I look back and I am proud of myself for not letting them turn me into someone I am not. Basically,and sorry for the cliché,be yourself. It may cause some grief now but you'll be thankful when you're older. I hope you have a beautiful life and sorry this was so long lol

randomizing profile image

randomizing 5 years ago from United Kingdom Author


Thank you very much for your comment. I completely understand what you are saying and i couldn't agree more. I am so happy that your life turned out to be very nice and i am happy that you got to be happy in the end and happy to be yourself.

Thank you very much for the comment... !! :)

dawney profile image

dawney 5 years ago from California

Hang in there, I have a teenage son who was once very popular and had a lot of friends and then one day he didn't. He became depressed and lonely and went through a very dark phase which scared the hell out of everyone. I couldn't figure out what was wrong and eventually just decided to be there for him and not ride him about it. He's changed and has slowly started to come out of it. It's been a while but I can start to see he's happier. He's had some help with a counselor when he was ready and finds he is much happier with a couple of good friends than a bunch of not so good ones. It will bet better.

randomizing profile image

randomizing 5 years ago from United Kingdom Author


thank you for your comment. I am happy to hear that he is feeling much better... obviously it is just a phase of life... some teenagers feel the pressure more than others..

but i am very happy he is starting to talk more and coming out.

mandymoreno81 profile image

mandymoreno81 4 years ago

This has been going on since the dawn of man, but I think it's gotten worse in society now. I'm in my early 20s and as a girl I felt these pressures a lot in school. There were certain expectations of me on how to act and dress and if I didn't conform, then I was a loser. When I got into college people tended to be more accepting and care less about differences, but people still passed judgement.

Rehana Stormme profile image

Rehana Stormme 4 years ago

Hi, this is a great hub! I spent most of my teenage years feeling lonely. Although I was very bright and always had top grades, I had very few friends. My Mom said it was better to have few friends. But still I believe I was a social person who wanted lots of friends, but I just couldn't fit in for some reason. Realizing this made me quite self-conscious - like something was wrong with me. Growing up really helps! Now, I've shed off many of those negative traits I had in my teen years and mostly, I don't give a damn what other people think. Once again, great hub, made me reminisce early in the morning!

randomizing profile image

randomizing 4 years ago from United Kingdom Author

@ Rehana Stormne

I am glad you liked this Hub. :) Unfortunately we all have to go through the "lonely phase" but luckily most of us manage to get through it, and i agree with you on the fact that it is relieving when you realize that all the comments people make about you are mostly because they are jealous or they just have nothing better to do with their own life. Thanks again for commenting :))

independentminded 4 years ago

Unfortunately, however(although not always), this kind of meanness by kids in their teens all too often carries over into adulthood. I still remember being excluded and kept out of things because I was different than the other kids I grew up living with and going to school with. I was not only routinely subject to nasty taunts by some stupid boys, but I was also excluded and ostracized by girls, as well. Girls can be rather sneaky. There were two girls in my grade, on my street, who were the best of friends and not only played together, but did things together as well. They were like peas in a pod. Often enough, I'd come and ask if I could play or join in, and they'd make up some sort of an excuse. I was very seldom invited to play or do things with the other kids, and they very seldom allowed me to join them in whatever they were doing. It hurt, I cried about it frequently, but I often received this sort of "well, it's your own fault--you've gotta change" attitude. Of course, I couldn't change for the other kids. That's something I couldn't and wouldn't do.

I was never asked to dance at school dances, so, after a point, I stopped going.

I realize that many of these kids, including one of the girls on my street who used to constantly exclude me from things, are the same snotty people that they were as teenagers.

Adults, too, can tease. I remember one summer, about 33 years ago, I had a summer job at a sweater warehouse right down near a tough white working class section of Boston. Although there were a number of high school students and college students (including myself) who worked there in the summer, there were a number of men and women from the nearby white working class area who worked there year around to support themselves and their families on the poor wages that they were paid at that job. Many of them were uneducated, with no skills, and probably dropped out of high school to take these jobs, or took these jobs right after high school, but who knows. ?

Although there was much funny bantering from some of the guys who worked there year around, with the students who worked at this particular warehouse, some of them were less tolerant, even as adults, of differences. A young man, a Senior at U/Mass Boston, who was going back to school in the fall, came to work at the warehouse towards the end of the summer. I don't know what his problems were, but he definitely had some problems that helped explain a lot of the weird things that he did. Many of the guys who worked there, including some of the students, but especially the year round guys, teased this young man unmercifully. Sometimes, some of the women would come to this young man's defense and tell them to quit teasing him, but that generally fell on deaf ears.

I think that, in any case, most people don't really change all that much.

I admit that some of the memories are still vivid in my mind, even though it was all years ago. Somebody once said that people who're nasty will get theirs someday. In some cases, it proved right. One guy from my old hometown who was always nasty to me ended up a severe alcoholic, although I don't know what happened to him as of now. Another guy ended up a heroin addict and served a jail term for stealing in order to obtain heroin. Still another guy ended up with Alzheimer's Disease and had to be put into a home by his two grown children.

Even adults online, too, can be really nasty. There are a couple of blogs that I stopped posting on because the other posters on that board couldn't and wouldn't tolerate my dissenting opinions on things. I decided that it wasn't worth it, and stayed off of those blogs.

Troy 4 years ago

I did't read all the posts but as a man lot of you and I think we should all accept them. As a aman of 47yrs I can, I know any man can say sorry but as my cousin said to say sorry means to forgive and forget but to those

who are like me its hard but not impossible. fro

m someone who does't deserve anything . LOVE YOU ALLL TLZ

jenny 4 years ago

its first time im visiting this site ..... its really a great hub im a teenager and i face all the probs dat's listed ... they are realistic

brett 4 years ago

im almost 17 and i am going through this stuff in school now and just sometimes i cant handle it... sometimes i just want to end it all.. i mean im a nice guy but it just seems like nobody cares about me... there are people that i trust... but it seems like i can only find those people online and in different states, so i cant really be around them and talk to them face to face.. but i still cant take all the ridicule and torture, even from my own brother, in the 7th grade he told every one i was gay... i mean thats my brother i don't know why someone would do that to their own brother... but after reading this page i understand that im not the only one that is having a hard time with loneliness... i don't want to end my life but its just so hard when i dont really have anyone to catch me if i fall

a49eracct profile image

a49eracct 4 years ago

To all the teenagers reading this hub- you all feel lonely. Even the cool kids feel lonely. Most of all of you are suffering from depression. And many of you just want it all to end. When you realize that you aren't alone, things get better. Part of what's going on right now is you are trying to figure our who you are. Your mind and body are changing at the same time. It can be so very confusing. It seems no one understands, because every one you talk to is feeling the same way. I am here to tell you, that it will pass. Some things that may help are joining clubs, finding activities outside school, or even a local church group for teens.

But the MOST IMPORTANT thing I can tell you, is not to turn away from your parents. I know that for many of you, that seems like the most pointless thing to do- but it helps. Start a small conversation about what's going on at school. Tell them how the kids at school make you feel. The more included they are in your life, the better things will get.

Your parents may not understand at first, and you will get frustrated with them sometimes, but at the end of the day they are the two people in this world who will never stop loving you and never give up on you.

And teens, feel free to message me about anything or ask questions!

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 4 years ago from Tasmania

Brett, I am only in this hub because I followed a link in "a49eracct" 's profile. She had posted something in another hub which I have been following.

So..... just responding to your comment above, I do implore you to find someone to chat to about your worries. Please, Mate, don't take it all on your own shoulders. You have had the courage and the concern to post something so genuine in this hub, so you have a lot going for you!

If I can just offer you the name of a book which might interest you at this time, it's "The New Manhood" by a guy named Steve Biddulph:

One of the things that can get to us when we are in our mid-late teens, and looking forward to that vague future as a "man," is that these days there are very few good examples of what you can expect.... "How is being a man different to what I am now? Can't see much to attract me really! " Do you find this? (Don't want to put words or feelings into your mind which are not already there.)

Anyway, Steve really has addressed this subject, for men of all ages. It's a great book for the women (mothers, sisters, etc.) to read as well. It talks about being a "man" in terms which are not easy to come up with... puts real feelings into words. There is a lot of hope, Brett. Lots of challenges yes, but they are really worth taking up and working towards a future. You probably can't see that far ahead yet, but please, trust what I am saying.

Look after yourself.

kingmaxler profile image

kingmaxler 4 years ago from Olympia, Washington USA

It is incredibly hard during the teen years. So much is expected of you while your body is going through physical, mental and emotional changes. It get magnified when your home life is unstable or nonexistent. I am so sorry for the loneliness you are going through. Things change and your body will stabilize. You write about your experience in a compelling way. Thank you.

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 4 years ago from Australia

Hey, what a great hub. A lot of thought and effort obviously went into it and I found it to be very interesting and helpful. Voting it up.

Everyone who has written a comment here gets my respect.

Message to Brett who wrote " i don't want to end my life but its just so hard when i don't really have anyone to catch me if i fall."

I understand what you're saying, but I want you to know that not everyone has someone to catch them. The world is filled with people who fall without someone to catch them. They generally cry a little, swear a lot, then dust themselves off and get on with their lives.

It is not fair that you are suffering ridicule and torture. Your brother sounds like a huge disappointment. Can you talk with your parents about this? It's hard to see how you can undo all the trouble you're having at school. Is there another school you can change to?

The best news about your story, Brett, is that you are 17. Nearly out of school. Great! Life gets so much better when you leave school. You can go to college or get a job ... and leave your brother and others who torment you behind you.

Again, randomizing, great hub. I honestly believe one of the greatest challenges we all face in life is surviving being a teenager! Good luck everybody.

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 4 years ago from Tasmania

LongTimeMother, glad you came into this Hub. I concur with you about the "being a teenager." Only now, 50 years later, can I begin to look back on my childhood and teenaged years. They were hard. I suspect there was some Asperger's involved but it's not been diagnosed, and back when I was a child the syndrome had only just been described, let alone categorized. But looking back, the jigsaw pieces are gradually coming together. I am learning to drop the blame on others for my childhood difficulties, and see them as just part of the journey.

One thing is for certain: I'm glad I didn't drop out literally. The unique qualities of my life have brought unique experiences and joys. It's worth hangin' in there.

a49eracct profile image

a49eracct 4 years ago


You mention the possibility of Asperger's. My soon to be brother-in-law was diagnosed with that when he was young. He doesn't like to talk about it, and had a very very tough teen life. I am wondering exactly what it is? Professionals say it is a form of "high performing autism", but to most of us, we have no idea what that means! I would appreciate your insight, if you don't mind sharing.

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 4 years ago from Australia

Hey, jonnycomelately, I believe that teenagers need to hear stories from people like you and me and Rehana and Mandy and everyone else who has been an unhappy young person ... so they can see living examples of survivors of ghastly teenage years.

In one of my hubs I wrote about the options teenagers who are feeling suicidal have when they really can't cope with home or school life - including leaving home with or without their parents' support ... a suggestion that's generally not popular among parents, until they think about the implications of 'any future' for their child instead of 'no future'.

Like you, I view life as a journey.

Lots of us travel a rocky road that feels lonely and remote when we are teenagers, and it is just so hard to imagine that things could get any better further down the road. But life does get better. I know it, you know it, and all of us who have survived being a teenager should try to help future generations of teenagers know it as well.

"Hang in there, kids!" I feel like yelling from the rooftops. "Just a few more years and you can take control of your own life, and leave all the people who annoy you behind you."

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 4 years ago from Tasmania

a49eracct , I sent a post yesterday in response to your enquiry about Asperger's. However, that post has not been approved yet. I don't know why. Maybe the Hub Author will either approve it or let me know if it has to be edited... it was a fairly long response.

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 4 years ago from Tasmania

In lieu of my previous post being approved/rejected, I need to let you know I am not in any way professionally qualified in the area of Asperger's. It is an interest to me only by way of considering memories of my early childhood. I might or might not have been affected by it. However, many of the characteristics of Asperger's seem to be true of myself. I have not had any expert assessment.

If I am allowed to do this, here is the URL for the Website I have looked at:

Importantly, as I see it, there has been lots of research and advancement in understanding the condition. So you brother-in-law-to-be can be very hopeful of getting a great life and rising above the problem.

So I hope this helps you.

lifegamer 4 years ago from Hawley, Pa., USA

Dearest randomizing...You are well on your way...What an eloquently done, wisely thought out piece this is, indeed!:)

It never ceases to amaze me how creativity & expression bloom from adversity...and you have fabulously used the tool! May it always serve you so well, Beloved...May you continue to touch so many in your process...

...Good Journey!:)

randomizing profile image

randomizing 4 years ago from United Kingdom Author

@lifegamer thank you very much for your kind words. They will surely help in boosting my confidence in writing such pieces. :)

a49eracct profile image

a49eracct 4 years ago


That was really interesting, I am planning on getting his book from my library. Thank you!

MsDora profile image

MsDora 4 years ago from The Caribbean

I'm sure you've been encourage by other hubbers, and I see that you found some on your own. I love the quotes you chose. I just want to add that I commend you very highly for speaking out/writing about how you feel. Loneliness ceases to be a demon once you address it. Hope you can find some good friends or support group to interact with you. Sincerely.

Zach 4 years ago

I always feel lonely even with my best friends who worry about me, we've been friends since I can remember, they mask It but they all have girlfriends and seeing them with their girlfriends makes me so lonely. They spend it of Time with these girls now which leaves me sitting at school with ransoms just floating around

randomizing profile image

randomizing 4 years ago from United Kingdom Author


I understand exactly how you feel... and unfortunately it IS terrible.. but I'm sure you'll find someone, that beautiful girl who will turn your life up-side-down :) I feel the same way with my friends sometimes and it is irritating, just be patient and everything will turn out right :)

Good Luck Zach :)

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 4 years ago from Tasmania

Without wishing to sermonize any of you folks, this is said in all honesty and with your best needs addressed:

Searching for the answer to your loneliness in someone else, "out there," whether it be a boy friend, girl friend, mate, an older person, a younger person, a film star, a sports idol......any one "out there" is not your answer.

The real answer comes from learning to address yourself, just as yourself, and becoming comfortable with your self. Just as you are. Warts and all.

You might think you are ugly. You might think you are an idot (because some says you are!). You might be hopeless at sports, or mathematics, or drama, etc., etc. All these things are "add-ons." They are not the real program of your life.

Somehow, sometime, in due course, according to the unique road of your life, you will come to understand this: When you can look honestly at yourself, love the person that you are, laugh at yourself and all of your "mistakes," then you will be on the winning leg of the race.

THEN you will find that someone else who comes into your life will not be there because you are lonely. They will be there because they LIKE you, not because you are desperate for their company.

Hope I am not being too heavy on you.

4 years ago

You just described my life right now...

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 4 years ago from Tasmania

Ok, V. This is not my Hub, but would you like to share with us commentators here more of what you are feeling? Would you like some feedback?

Others here might be able to give you a few tips about moving forward in your life

Personally, I don't want to pull you, or push you, into any particular way of thinking. That is choice for you to make. We must all respect you here. However, sometimes all it takes is for someone to mention something to you which just triggers a totally new way of looking at things. This can be the one thing which gives you a sort of "leg up."

It can be something remarkably simple, like: If you are trying out a new computer program and you get stuck on one particular part of page. You can't think how to move on. Then a friend comes and looks over you shoulder, sees what you are stuck on and says, "Press that key....." and away you go again, problem solved. Life can be a bit like that.

You have friends and allies here. We are all mostly anonymous, but even that can be a benefit.

Try writing and talking about yourself. We can listen, with great respect.

Kelly 4 years ago

I Went through some harsher things in life that truly made me feel alone. I remember this faze, it hurt. I remember i tried so hard to be like the popular girls who (excuse my foul language) only ended up being whores, that i became so insecure and suffered from B.D. d (Body Dysmorphic Disorder) and Anorexic and Bullimic nervousa and was almost raped by my so called "boyfriend" several times. And after that i completely shut down. Didn't talk to anyone, didn't try to be friends with anyone, just cried all the time and cut my wrists and such. My father loved to put me down as well, and i didn't have many friends anymore, because i realized they were alle fake. I felt so lonely. It still hurts to think about that feeling. With counceling and seeing a nutritionist i'm healthier than ever physically and mentally and i have confidence, which helped me make real friends i trust in, and am now very please and satisfied. I never feel lonely anymore :) best of luck to all who have to deal with this!

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 4 years ago from Tasmania

Thanks Kelly. Deep stuff.

Amitchev 4 years ago

Thank you so much for your post I just recently started feelin lik this it really helps to know that others have experienced this. Again thanl you so much.

crazed 4 years ago

funny the vidio is not a alable in the U.S.A

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 4 years ago from Tasmania

It's not available in Australia, either. Blocked on Copyright grounds.

Anonymous 4 years ago

I am a teenager. And the only thing I am unhappy with is that I have little friends. Maybe that is why the biggest depression that I ever faced happened. Even though I don't do or think of anything, I just feel depressed. I just want it to end. Ever since school started, I have been feeling very lonely and depressed. Is this really going to pass? Will I ever become myself in front of everyone and have lots of friends?

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 4 years ago from Tasmania

Anonymous, the way you have written I can get your feelings.... thanks for sharing. All the time you can express your feelings there is hope. At least here you can do that and not be looked down upon. I fully respect you and the position you find yourself in right now.

Obviously, I can't know much about you and it's no good guessing the details.

So, maybe the only thing I can do is share just a little of my life with you and hope that by so doing it will be a seed of courage for you to keep going.

I am a man of 71 now. Life has not been at all easy socially. The lack of friends and companionship in my life has been painful at times. My loneliness seems to have happened for no apparent reason, most of the time. Who knows, it might be something I do, or say, or don't do, or don't say. It can help to have someone around that has the courage to tell me what I am doing wrong, but it's part of the problem, isn't it? "No one around to tell me!" Do you find that?

Anyway, because of my loneliness, I have learned to do things differently from the crowd. Where I see a crowd of people doing their thing, and I am not invited, or simply left out of it, then I go and do something which attracts me personally. This way my individuality builds up and up, my experiences are unique to my life. I get to see and experience awesome things, which the crowd obviously misses out on entirely.

I started travelling on my own at a very early age. Took a train ride, when I was about 7 or 8 years old, the journey was all of 6 km each way! Doesn't that sound silly? But it was a big "doing my stuff" thing at that age. It cost me 3 old English pence! It was setting the pattern for my life.

Later, I did a 2500km trip from England to the south of Switzerland, on a 50cc Honda motorcycle. All by myself. You see the pattern now?

So, what am I saying to you? Don't give up on your self, my friend. Your life has unique meaning and you are ready to explore. Do so. Open your eyes and see things in a way that only you can. The friends and companions who meet you on the way will all add their little bit to your experiences. But you will not get caught up in the big crowd..... you will be too smart for that.

Wishing you well. If you ever want to join HubPages and write your own stuff here, go for it. It might open doors for you which you have never dreamed of.

I hope this has not sounded too much like a sermon. It's not intended to be.

Joseph 4 years ago

I often find myself suffering from depression, usually because of some failed relationship or other.

I don't have a lot of friends, but the ones that I do are pretty loyal.

my advice to the teens who have posted their feelings here is to turn to your parents if possible.

if you have an interest in something become absorbed in it as much as you can.

Esther  Strong profile image

Esther Strong 3 years ago from UK

Reading this hub and the comments has taken me back to some dark times I had as a teenager. Somehow I made it through. PLEASE know that you will too. I wholly agree with Jonnycomelately's comments above, especially the bit about not giving up on yourself.

Somehow I muddled through my extended teenage loneliness phrase and right now I am very contented with my life in general compared to how I was as a teenager.

If I could have my time over again, I would have thrown myself into perfecting the art of positive thinking. This ties in with the comments above about looking for the answer within yourself. Only YOU can make yourself happy. Don't wait around for someone else to do this for you. Believe in yourself and take responsibility for your own happiness and, even if you do not have lots of loyal friends, with positive thinking you can become your own best friend. Be good and kind to yourself - you deserve it.

Again, please do look into positive thinking.

Ram 3 years ago

I am in a same situation here. But i don't want to post my problem in a public blog. could any one please mail me to so that i can connect you

randomizing profile image

randomizing 3 years ago from United Kingdom Author

@Ram I just emailed you :) For anything else, don't hesitate to contact me through my profile as well.

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 3 years ago from Tasmania

@Ram, the same goes for me as for randomizing. I am available through my Profile, but I think you younger guys can help each other a lot, so go for that first. You understand each others' language, your experiences as younger people in this modern age, which we oldies find a bit daunting, in the same way you would probably find us difficult to understand sometimes.

However, we (at least I) do have some basic life-principles which I think are important, and we can share those with you if you are interested and ask.

Wishing you success on your journey.

1Click DVD Copy 3 years ago

Hella great blog! Very helpful, very informative, and very well written. Very relative to my interests!

... 3 years ago

I feel like that sometimes, especially on weekends. I try reading and listening to music or go on youtube to distract myself but it doesn't really work...

i don't think i have a problem but i use to though. I suffered depression and anxiety for two years mostly because of friendship problems and afraid of how people view me when i talk to them

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 3 years ago from Tasmania

I do understand you.... you are not alone, and you are not peculiar..... you are a normal lovely person. There is a special place in this world which you are the best person to fill..... it might mean a long search for you, or you might find that special space in a very quick search. Just be courageous and search... there is a victory waiting for you to put in the effort.

You have put a lot of your truth and honesty into this sentence. I really admire you for that. So keep trying, never stop, never get low because you think there's something wrong with you. You are a normal person, and with your honesty you will find someone to support you through the difficult times.

Please, keep coming back to HubPages. There are others here who will be very happy to talk with you. I for one do not look down on you. I admire you for having the guts to talk about your problems.

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 3 years ago from Australia

Hey, teenagers, I'm back to check how everyone is doing. I was hoping there might be a few updates from people like Brett and Jenny. Pleased to see a few more teens have stopped in and left a comment.

That's great. You want to talk, there's people here listening. Not judging, just listening.

What a brilliant place you've created here randomizing. I've voted you up and awesome again!

I also want to express my huge respect for jonnycomelately. Thanks, jcl, for responding so promptly to the people who leave messages here.

For those of you have read all the comments on this page, including jonnycomelately talking about his childhood in England, I don't know if you know where Tasmania is, but it's in Australia. I'm willing to bet money that when he was young in England he never thought he'd be living on the other side of the world.

I grew up here in Australia, but I lived in the UK for a few years and I've spent quite a lot of time in other countries including the US. Never thought I would when I was a kid.

Life is full of great things that we don't see coming when we're young and stuck in lives that feel like we're smothering.

What a shame we don't have a crystal ball that tells us what the future holds, and what we can look forward to. I wish when I was a miserable teenager, someone had said to me "Hang in there, kid. One day you're going to see inside the Queen's Chamber of the Great Pyramid in Egypt. Stick around, because you're not going to want to miss it."

I wouldn't have believed them. Not in a million years. But I have in fact been inside the Queen's Chamber in the Great Pyramid, and I've travelled down the River Nile. When I was at school, hating history and geography, I never saw that trip coming. lol.

Once a lonely kid feeling just as bad as you teenagers do now, I never thought for a minute that I'd have an exciting life. I wasn't sure I'd have any life. But I am SO glad that I had a chance to get past the black and ugly parts and into the really nice, bright places that you can reach when you're an adult.

Tell us your problems, and we'll see if we can offer some kind of helpful advice. At least you'll know we are listening.

I wrote a hub a while back for teenagers who are feeling so depressed that it is hard to imagine any kind of future. I don't think I'm supposed to promote it here, but what the heck, you kids are worth any scolding that I get, so here's the link ...

Have a look at it. There's a whole list of successful adults who looked and felt like complete failures when they were young. There's no reason why each and every one of you can't be just as successful in the future.

Actually, I think anyone who is reading this page has a very good chance of getting through your difficult lonely stage and doing great things. Why? Because you're smart enough to be on the internet looking for help and ideas. To me, that shows great spirit.

Whether you leave a comment on a hub page or not, you just have to know that there are people out here in the world who genuinely care, and want you to be strong and hang in there.

I've been a mother for a long time now. I've seen a lot of teenagers near rock bottom who became spectacular adults living happy lives with their own kids years later. That's what I'm expecting will happen for you. You just have to allow yourself to grow into the adult that you're going to be. It won't take as long as you think. I promise.

Good luck. xxx

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 3 years ago from Tasmania

LongTimeMother, you have hit on some wonderful insights here :)

I don't know if any of you people have seen this video clip, but it brought tears to my eyes. (Hope people seeing it on Ipods or small screens can get as much out of it as I did. It also helps to have good sound, like using headphones.)

The lesson it brought to me was: We never know what great experience is just around the corner..... so keep open to the unexpected!

I loved the way that Silver Back guided one of his offspring with his hand.... don't think I look quite like him if I walk on my hands and knees, but not very different! And the feeling I get from his careful protection that wells up in me. It's that need for a caring family, isn't it? We all need it, and I am hoping you lonely teenagers can sample a little of it.

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 3 years ago from Australia

Hey jonnycomelately. It is 2 o'clock in the morning where I live, so I'm pretty darned sure it is 2am in Tasmania as well. lol.

I tried to play that link but it has the audio blocked. I was wondering if its because I'm in oz, but if it works for you it should work for me. Hmmm. I'll try it again in the morning. Thanks.

Rekha Bhatt 3 years ago

I liked this hub very much.

Not only teenagers but sometimes elder people also feel lonely.

Thanks for posting.

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 3 years ago from Australia

Hi Rekha. That's very true! :)

livinggood profile image

livinggood 3 years ago from California

I too was a lonely teenager and it almost destroyed me. It took over 20 years of drugs and alcohol to finally realize that it was all my fault that I was lonely. I had allot of friends, but I did not hang out with them do to depression. Instead I would drink and get high. Don't let this happen to your life.

who-is-william profile image

who-is-william 3 years ago

Loneliness and depression can have similar feelings for a person, also loneliness can cause depression. I'm not sure if it's a 'phase' in life because you can feel or be lonely at any age or at any time. I'm lonely for about 2 years now, actually I've been lonely for all my life, it's just now that I'm really realizing it, 18 years old now and I feel like I'm in this vicious circle which I'll never come out. No Money - No Friends

- Loneliness - Depression - No Money .. etc, etc..

I just don't know what to do.

Every time I watch videos from YMCMB I try to imagine how much better my life would be if I had the same amount of cash that they have on my bank account.

jane 3 years ago


jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 3 years ago from Tasmania

Hi Jane.... how is life working out for you?

mashmallw pwnxess 3 years ago

its really lonely being a teen.....i wish i cud die...but neither i want to die or neither wornt to be alive....wat to do guyxxx???

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 3 years ago from Tasmania

mashmallw, I hear you! Can I say what I think you are saying?

Are you saying this: "I want to live a life that I really enjoy living. I want a life I can share with other people." I bet you are. I want this for you too. And if you look through every other post in this thread you will maybe find someone else who is thinking a bit like you.

You are NOT totally alone, but it can feel like that sometimes. Especially when you tell yourself you are alone.

I am old and I have known being alone.... really alone. But right now, the sun IS shining. The day IS good. I just have to be patient, because not every day is sunny, and not every day is good.

Please, keep talking here. There are others who will read what you say. We will listen to you.

randomizing profile image

randomizing 2 years ago from United Kingdom Author

@mashmallw pwnxess

If you ever want to message me privately and talk about ANYTHING.. I am here to listen to you and help you. I have been through some stuff myself and I'b be more than happy to listen and hopefully make you feel better. :)

Just remember you are not alone and people are willing to help if you let them :)

Angela 2 years ago

Dear randomizing,

unfortunately, the email function didn't work so I have to post here. I wanted to ask you for your kind permission using excerpts of your article for my English lessons in some classes. I think it meets their emotions and makes them to work more intensely with an English text. Please kindly let me know if this is fine with you. Thanks, Angela

randomizing profile image

randomizing 2 years ago from United Kingdom Author

Hello Angela, sorry for the late reply, yes I am happy to share my hub with you :) No problem, glad I could help.

uma sabo 2 years ago

If this is a dream believe me i don't wish to wake up,After 10years relationship with my lover Tom Walker he just decided to have a divorce with me because he was having an affair with another lady and the lady told him to break up with me so she can come and took my position when Tom told me that he was no longer interested that he is tired of me i was like after 10years now you are tired of me so the next thing was a letter from the lawyer saying Tom said he needs a divorce when i saw the letter tears rushed out of my eye i composed my self and said wow this world has around turned round against me.So i decided to try all my possible best until one day when i was listen to the radio where i saw people giving testimony how there divorce was cancelled within 24 hours i was like this is same problem am having i just say people testifying in the name of this great man called Dr sabo for what he has done for them how he has helped them to bring back there lover i waited for the problem to finish and they dropped Dr sabo cell number and email,Immediately i gave dr sabo a call and shared my problem with him he just told me not worry that he assures me that Tom will tell the lawyer to cancel the divorce within 24 hours really what Dr sabo said came to past within the 24 hours was a call from tom crying that he his just coming from the lawyers office that he does not need a divorce anymore that he wants me back home that he his sending that lady away so when he said that i was so happy now Tom came home brought all document and told the lawyer that he his willing everything to me and that he wants me to be the right owner of everything he owns i was so happy,I bless the day i meant dr sabo meeting him was never a regret please clean your tears dr sabo is here to solve your problem you can contact him on

Name:Jasmine Berries Country Canada

Maddie 2 years ago

At school I feel unappreciated and feel invisible. My 2 closest friends in my form have a very close relationship and I feel like the 3rd wheel. If something was to happen to me I don't think they would care. I have very low self confidence and am very shy. I have one close friend in another form who I feel cares about me but sometimes I feel like no one even cares.....

randomizing profile image

randomizing 2 years ago from United Kingdom Author

Hey @Maddie ! I am so sorry you feel this way. Probably it is not that your friends don't consider you, but if they really do, then they absolutely do not deserve you as a friend! I mean it when I say that I completely understand how you feel and please, if there is ANYTHING you would like to talk about, I am here to help you!

I know that sometime it is hard, but keep strong and be confident because it is just a hard phase in your life. I promise it will get better. Just give it time. Please e-mail me or inbox me for anything else or if you simply want someone to talk to or be listened :)

Sarah 2 years ago

I'm in high school and my best friends are the year above me, the group of girls I sit with now are so fake a part from one of them,so I've been attempting to change groups of friends that I sit with and talk to. The group I'm trying to get to know are very close so it will take time but I just feel really lonely, girls that I use to call friends don't seem to want to talk to me and I know it's probably for the best if that's how they are but I still feel lonely a lot thinking about going to school with no real group of friends, especially since I have a few years to go still.

Lizbeth 2 years ago

Hi, im dating an older guy im 15 hes 19 .... My mom and family all know about him i really do like him i just don't like the fact that he could go to jail my mom has anger problems she gets mad at me and my brothers for no reason i feel so alone some times .. I've tried to commit suicide before its not fun ... Idk what to do anymore

help pl 2 years ago

i have read the comments on here and rwally need someone to help daughter has been telling vicious lies about me saying i beat her and don't care and i just don't know what to do..i want to help her but don't know how can anyone help me pl

Someone 2 years ago

I have felt like shit lately ... I have been through a tough patch and seem to be more analysing so I used to be pretty cool but now it seems like i have been driving people away and m feeling quite lonely ...... Seems hell

randomizing profile image

randomizing 2 years ago from United Kingdom Author

hopefully it will just be a phase or just a bad period of your life, but remember to keep your head high and things will get better. I've experienced that as well and sometimes you need to be alone and have time for yourself and to think about things :) I'm sure everything will be okay

Alyssa 2 years ago

I just wanted to say thank you to everybody that has posted here -- I was feeling lonely again like I always do, and I managed to stumble upon this blog. It made me realize some things that I never considered or forgot... I only have one friend who is an internet friend and I don't get to talk to her often anyway because she's busy with school... I don't fit in anywhere (I don't really want to fit it anyway; just accepted) so I often end up feeling this way. I'm shy so talking doesn't come easy for me. I'm trying to work on it but it's a slow process.... it's a constant battle for me; always struggling to be happy but failing often. Anyway, I'm rambling but again thank you. :)

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 2 years ago from Tasmania

Alyssa, it's good and sensible that you had the courage to post here. I hear what you are saying. If there is anything more you feel a need to chat about, both I and several others will pick up on your post.

It's not good us saying glib one-liner problem solvers to you, they don't usually help. But if you have an urge to share more of your situation here, in public but anonymously, that can sometimes help others too. People might pick up on something you say and suddenly realise that they have perhaps a similar situation, or it triggers a link to something else they can do to improve things for themselves.

Just knowing your age would be a help when people offer you a reply.

Alyssa 2 years ago

Thank you. You're right about the one liner thing; I've learned that the hard way, searching the internet for answers. I'm 15, so unforuntely right in the middle of the teenage years. A few years ago I was in bad depression. I had lots of online friends back then, but we fought a lot (we were all kind of immature) so that didn't help. I was depressed about that, and how pathetic I was (being shy, losing my friends (eventually they stopped going on the website and I fell out with my last friend that was left), being weak, among other things). In 2012, after I had lost all my friends, I found something to help me cope. I found a tv show. That got me out of depression if you can believe it. In 2013, I started becoming more mature and decided to start changing things, like working on the whole shy issue. You can't make your life better if you don't do anything about it right? I made a friend like I mentioned. I'm also not as shy as I once was. As you can see though, I struggle a lot... the mood swings associated with being a teenager doesn't help. In late 2013 and early 2014 being lonely started getting to me more and I started distracting myself from it without realizing it. I did that with books and tv shows. After I would get done with the book or tv show though I would become depressed. Right now I'm trying to rely less on those things, and more with real life. It's hard though because I'm homeschooled and can't really make friends. I always feel awkward around people anyway; I feel like they'll get mad at me for no good reason or that I need to act a certain way for them to like me. I used to go to public school and I'm thinking about going to a class or two in a school again in the fall... honestly though it scares me. Sometimes I think I'll be able to do it, maybe make a friend, but then other times I think I'll just be alone with people excluding me like when I used to go to public school.

You seem to have survived though so hopefully I will be able to survive too haha.

Also, I'm happy to have found a site like this. A few weeks ago I was feeling worse than ever... I felt like there was nothing good about the world, nothing will change, etc. More than anything I wanted someone to talk to about it. My family was out of the question because I just feel awkward talking to them... I didn't want to bother my friend either since she was busy. So that left me with nobody but myself to talk to. Luckily I got over that bout of depression. I should probably stop before this gets any longer haha.

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 2 years ago from Tasmania

Alyssa, I hope what I want to say now does not sound (again) like that "one-liner solution."

Just that being 15 is not the time of life you need to feel "mature," or "with it," or to "know where you are going."

I would see it as a time to learn lots of the basic things that might be of use to you in life. You can't know what will be useful, or when it might arise.... but having lots of little skills, or at least the beginnings of those skills, under you skin, can give you a bit of a focus.

Let's suggest a few of them. Learning to touch-type. It does not look like the standard QWERTY keyboard will go out of fashion soon. And once you have got the pattern of working your fingers to the tune of your mind it will always come back to you when required, no matter how long you live. Your typing will become more accurate. You will eventually have your fingers typing what you are thinking, and just as fast. This is a skill you could pick up in a few weeks if you are persistent and disciplined at it. (I would suggest going out to a course, rather than doing it at home off the Internet. You said you need company, this might be one way of getting it.) Maybe you already do touch type. If so that is excellent.

Then there is a basic personal economics course....learning to manage your finances. Start now, and you will continue learning this skill for your whole life.... because you will always make mistakes, no matter how much you think you know. And the lessons will help you recover and survive from mistakes.... that is one of the biggest lessons of life for survival.

Not aiming to become expert at anything, or being a "trainee manager," because that needs you to have experience on the bottom rung or the ladder.

Look around for other skills you think might be appropriate. You never know what's just around the corner.

I just hope these ideas are food for thought. Work out whatever fits for you at this time, and go for it.

Wishing you well.

Tiara 2 years ago

Hey! Thank you for this article! I'm 17 and feeling this kind of depression/loneliness. I thought I'm just the only one feeling like this! After reading this, I feel a bit comfortable right now... Thankyou again!):)

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 2 years ago from Tasmania

I would just like to add one more note to Alyssa.... on reading your last post again, something occurred to me: you write very well. You said you are home-schooled. Well that certainly seems to have paid off here at least! The grammar, spelling, punctuation are all pretty good and you have been able to express yourself and your feels well. (I was never anywhere near that good in my teens.)

So, you are off to a good start in life. If you care to come back to this hub occasionally and let us know of any progress, that might give your fellow readers some encouragement, too.

randomizing profile image

randomizing 2 years ago from United Kingdom Author

Hi Tiara, I'm glad the article helped you! :) I wish you the best of luck!

manissha 2 years ago

hy thanx for this inspiring article bt still i feel alone nd m going in darkness i cant feel anything i have lots of pains in my heart

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 2 years ago from Australia

What are you saying, manissha? Talk to us.

manissha 2 years ago

i feel ignored

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 2 years ago from Australia

You have my attention right now, manissha. Which country are you in? I am in Australia ... and happy to chat with you for a while. What's happening in your life?

manissha 2 years ago

moreover i cant control my anger i fell frustrated i want to change my attitude bt i dnt know how ?

manissha 2 years ago

i live in India

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 2 years ago from Australia

It is 1 o'clock in the morning, here but I will stay awake a while longer because I am wondering what pains your heart. Would you like to talk about it?

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 2 years ago from Australia

What are you angry about? Do you have problems with your family?

manissha 2 years ago

yes sure i want to talk i am very upset with my attitude i get irritate with pity things i feel no is there around me i just lonely i try to share it wid others bt i dnt know how to express my fellings :(

manissha 2 years ago

no nt wid my family bt i think peer presure disturbs me i have no friend wid whom i can share my sorrows

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 2 years ago from Australia

How old are you? Do you go to school?

manissha 2 years ago

yes m 15 years old

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 2 years ago from Australia

I remember being 15, and a few of my kids have passed the 15 year old mark. I can tell you it all gets much easier as you get older. Some of the annoying things we do (like getting angry about stupid things), we just grow out of.

Other things we learn how to handle better.

What's your biggest problem right now?

manissha 2 years ago


LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 2 years ago from Australia

Surely there must be good websites or forums where teenagers can chat with each other ... just like I'm chatting with you now ... and share their sorrows.

Have you heard of any, manissha? Would you like me to ask around and see if I can make any suggestions?

If you think it is not a good idea, just tell me. But if the internet had been invented when I was a teenager, I'd have loved to chat with other teens in other countries. (lol! I learned to type on a manual typewriter and can remember being excited to use an electric typewriter. I feel like a dinosaur because you kids know so much about technology.)

manissha 2 years ago

no dnt do this bt after chatting wid u i feel relax thanku so much m really feeling gd now for d 1 time i expressed my feelings to some 1 and the experience was awesome ;)

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 2 years ago from Australia

manissha, I just found one that has over 78,000 members and over 1 million posts. I scrolled all the way to the bottom of the page and there's heaps of posts from today. Lots of threads about lots of topics.

You can either be a member or a guest.

I am hoping you might check it out and then come back here and write to tell us if it is a good site or not. I know you'd rather have friends in the real world, but maybe having some online teens to chat with will help you feel less lonely. And maybe it might help you to feel more confident at school as well.

Would you please have a look and share your thoughts with me and others who come to this page?

I will definitely check back for your thoughts after my busy day tomorrow. (Nearly 2 in the morning now and I have to be up and out in exactly 5 hours from now.)

I would like to chat with you again. :) I will have a look here in case you've left a note tomorrow. Take care!

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 2 years ago from Australia

lol. You wrote to me while I was writing to you. I had already looked ... but I didn't need to ask anyone. :)

I am very happy that you feel more relaxed. Expressing your feelings is a good thing.

If you discover a whole lot of teenagers to talk to on that forum, you might be too busy to come back and talk to me again ... but I will watch out, just in case. :) Bye for now.

jonnycomelately profile image

jonnycomelately 2 years ago from Tasmania

manissha, what I am about to say might sound like it's too much like you would read in a text book, and therefore you might not believe it...but I will say it anyway:

Sometimes the most difficult times can be essential for you to reach the best times. So, the path you are treading now, all that loneliness, will eventually be the experience which brings you the reward of treasured friendships. So .... hang in there, try to use your good sense and your intelligence to find ways to climb out of the "cave" you find yourself in right now.

LongTimeMother has spoken a lot of sense, and she obviously has a lot, really a lot, of concern for you. Do keep in touch here with us readers, even when life begins to improve for you. Because your sharing here might just help some other person in a very similar situation to yourself.

You are not alone, really; believe in your self and your own ability. Wishing you success and good friendships..... and don't forget the fun...try to get some of that, because as a young person you deserve it.

manissha 2 years ago

thanku so much i think now i gain my confidence back :) i checked the site it was gd i will wait for ur reply long time mother u have come as a light in my life bt words are not enough to say bt still i will say thanku

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 2 years ago from Australia

Hello manissha. I am pleased to hear you are feeling better. :) I hope you are happy on that forum or one like it. I'm sure there are lots of teenagers who feel lonely and ignored who will become friends to you online.

Life is not always easy, manissha ... but there will always be someone who will talk to you and help you when you need it. Lots of people like me do care enough to take time out for a chat. You just have to reach out like you did. Somebody will stop and give you attention

I wish you all the best for your life. :) Take care.

manissha 2 years ago

thanku :)

@loner 2 years ago

I am a fresher in college. I made two good girls friends. However when they meet up with the guys of our group they totally ignore me. What should I do?? I really need friends who will stay with me forever. I am the one who always has to start a conversation. People don't approach me on their own.

fluffy 2 years ago

Family struggles have caused me to make drastic decisions and I am still 18-I no longer live at home and I'm still in high school with no job license or car and life for me has always been the lonely kind. My parents always where doing their own thing so I learned to do things by myself and with one parent dead and the other parent not speaking to me, I find myself being lonely lost and confused-and I find myself clinging more to those people who make me feel more comfortable, but I still get depressed when they have to leave. I feel like an idiot half the time because I don't know what I'm doing and the other half, I feel like a caged animal begging for attention.

I do have a good support group but it doesn't seem like it's ever enough

It's like life isn't worth it if there isn't anybody to share it with.

LongTimeMother profile image

LongTimeMother 2 years ago from Australia

Hi fluffy. We all need friends, that's for sure. I'm on my way out the door for a hectic 12 hour stint helping a friend and I hope someone else has time to write to you before I get back. (Sometimes friends can be a drain on your energy levels. lol.) Nice to meet you.

Kerrin 19 months ago

I am going to be 16 years old in April and i have no friends i am home schooled till September and i am feeling so lonely when i see other people with their friends i feel even worse and i don't know how i should go about making friends because i don't know how to approach people i'm used to going to public school but we moved and now i just don't know what to do

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